Alcohol

I hate Alcohol. Hate it. Alcohol is a factor in more traffic deaths, domestic abuse, job firings, moral regrets, life altering addictions, and destroyed dreams than any other substance on Earth.

Before I continue, I should point out that my argument against alcohol is based solely on logic, not morality. Jesus drank. And coming from a Christian, I trust that assuages any presumption that I’m speaking from a perceived position of moral superiority. Drinking doesn’t make you a bad person. In fact, some of the best people I know drink.

That said,… I still hate alcohol. I’ve seen far too many lives altered or destroyed to keep silent on the issue. Alcohol is a drug, and far more dangerous than many illicit drugs. But because the government says it’s OK, people do it. Like other drugs, drinking is a form of self-medication. In small quantities, inhibitions are dulled, worries are forgotten, there’s a mild sense of euphoria… But consider the side effects. What if liquor had the same warning labels as other medications/drugs? “Caution: Flammable. Highly addictive. May cause inability to stand, slurred speech, altered personality, decreased mental capacity, violence, STDs, unwanted pregnancy, severe vomiting, unconsciousness, memory loss, inability to function at work, liver damage, and death to yourself or others while driving.” I don’t care if a drug cured cancer- with side-effects like that, you’d still think twice before taking it. Of course, alcohol doesn’t cure anything. So what does it offer in exchange for all these potential side-effects? A slightly better time at the party, or a short-lived procrastination of grief.

At its worst, alcohol kills approximately 75,000 people in the US each year. At its best, it temporarily changes who you are, how you think, and how you act. I believe in embracing who you are, not trying to mask it with mind-altering chemicals. I’d never consume anything that would dull my mind or cause me to act differently than I’d normally act.

I’m sick of our hypocritical society condemning tobacco, while celebrating alcohol. It disappoints me that people fall in line just because one’s more socially acceptable than the other. Multi-million dollar ad campaigns, policy changes, and even legislation have all simultaneously converged to inconvenience, ostracize, and humiliate smokers. Say what you will about the possible dangers of secondhand smoke. All I know is my family’s a lot more likely to be killed driving home tonight by the guy who had a few beers after work, than the guy who smoked a few cigarettes.

Are there a lot of people who will drink “responsibly,” never drink and drive, never hurt anyone, and never get addicted? Absolutely. But why risk it? When there’s a multi-million member organization (Alcoholics Anonymous) dedicated to overcoming a substance abuse problem, why would you voluntarily ingest that substance? Everyone should have the privilege of attending an AA meeting. When you’ve looked into the tear-filled eyes of individuals whose lives have been torn apart by booze, you think twice before taking it into your body. Many AA members proudly carry their 1 year, 5 year, or 10 year sober chips as a badge of honor. As well they should. They’ve succeeded in suppressing a monstrous vice. I recently hit 30 years sober. Though, I admittedly did it the easy way. And highly recommend it. I wonder how many AA members wish they could go back and take the easy path of never taking that first drink? I’d always wondered “If I were in their shoes, would I have the willpower to overcome that type of addiction?” Many years ago, when my missionary companion and I took a gun away from a suicidal man who’d lost everything to alcoholism, I thanked my lucky stars I’d never have to find out.

PTS

                                               

Today proved that  Rachel is suffering from PTS: Pre Teenager Syndrome-

1. Accident #1 before lunch (the #2 kind)
2. Accident #2 after lunch
3. Resulting in her favorite toy being taken away for one day
4. Spontaneously throws her arms around me and says "I love you". (yeah, she's not fooling anybody)
5. Trying to get out the door for preschool, "I'm going to go potty so I can get my toy back." (yeah, right)
6. After school errands were a success,albeit a little hyper and stressful for mom, ie this conversation:
R about Adam: "He's screaming."  Me: "I know, but please don't tell on him." R: "I'm not telling him, I'm telling you." Me: much laughter  R: "It's not funny!"
7. While putting groceries away, a tussle with Adam
8. When I tried to intervene I got a swat and a "Dang it, Mama!" (I let that one go. I was too stunned)
9. A good dinner followed by promise of ice cream
10. Accident #3 (the #2 kind again)
11. No ice cream
12. Great clean up time
13. Just about to repent and offer a chocolate instead when
14. She walks out of my room eating a stolen piece of chocolate
15. Bedtime pretty good,pjs, brush teeth,
16 "Go potty so you can get your sticker."
17. "I'm not listening!"
18. Accident #4
19. I'm done!*

*Before you start being concerned, and pouring in the advice, I really am on top of the fact that this is her personality. And I'll pour on the praise for positive behavior and she'll snap out of it soon enough. In the meantime, I will just shake my head and be grateful for bedtime!

For Wes

The last casual conversation Wes and I had has stuck with me. We were doing dinner dishes together after his mom had made us yet another fabulous meal.

W: "So, do you only take pictures of your house when it's clean, or is it really just clean all the time?"
Me: "Yeah, right. I barely take pictures at all cause I'm too busy. My house is cluttered and dirty daily."
W: "Oh good, I thought it was just us that couldn't keep up with it. Every time we really clean, it's dirty again two seconds later."

This got me thinking. I don't want to be one of those people who portrays a distorted view of my life. So, for your birthday,Wes, here is a picture of my house as it sits today, and just about everyday:

A Verse

I recently found myself sitting on an airplane, waiting for the final passengers to board. Flight attendants closed the door as the last passenger entered. She was a large woman, covered in tattoos, with disheveled hair, and a distinct cigarette smell. The kind of lady I’d be afraid to meet in a dark alley. She walked up and down the aisle a few times, searching in vain for an overhead bin to store her carry on. She tried to force it into a small opening, without much success. She pushed and shoved, but try as she might, couldn’t quite get the bin to close. You could sense the unspoken mood of the passengers on the plane. Frustration. Grumbling under their breath. “Come on lady. Just sit down.” After all, this wasn’t our problem. She should’ve gotten to the airport earlier. I found myself watching this whole scene unfold like a silent spectator. “She should put the wheels in first.” I thought to myself. “You can usually save an extra inch by sliding the wheels in first. I wonder if she’ll figure that out?” And then I heard a little voice inside my head. I’ve heard the Spirit speak to me on a few occasions. But this was the first time it’s ever sworn. It yelled at my conscience, and I quote: “What in the Hell is the matter with you?!!” And I suddenly realized, this wasn’t an actress on stage. And I wasn’t a powerless audience member. This was a human being. A fellow human being. Struggling with something, and probably embarrassed. I finally stood up and offered to help. As soon as I grabbed the bag, it was like the invisible wall between this woman and the rest of the passengers came crashing down. It was no longer an “us vs. her” mentality. But a combined “Us vs. this situation”. Several men took hold of her heavy bag, while others offered to help move their smaller items to free up space. One woman even commiserated with the lady “Don’t you hate the small overhead bins they give us?” There was a collective sense of accomplishment when we finally got everything to fit.

Too often we’re lulled into a sense of complacency when we’re in our bubble, or comfort zone. We feel insulated from our fellow man, and consequently justified in our self-imposed isolation. We figure “That’s someone else's problem. We don’t have any obligation to act. To speak up. Surely someone with a badge, a name-tag, or a position of authority will come along soon.” So I resolved from that moment….

I will not stand by like a silent spectator when I can step outside my bubble and help another human being. I will tear down the invisible walls around me, and stand up, speak up, show kindness, or assist in any way I can. I will no longer view my fellow men as actors on stage for my viewing pleasure. I will empower myself to step on stage with them should the need arise.

The question, O me! so sad, recurring—What good amid these, O me, O life?

Answer.

That you are here—that life exists and identity,

That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse. –Walt Whitman

That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse!

Typical Thursday

Most Thursdays, we rush out the door to go to the library for story time. Miss Jen, or Sasha give us a half hour of their best silly songs and books. We do puzzles and return old stories while we hunt for new ones. Then we hop over a fence to go to this park next door with our friends. If I have my act together, we have lunch. If I don't-we eat random snacks from the bottom of my purse and go home sooner when our tummies are hungry. If I have my act together, then I have a grocery list and we stop at the store on our way home. If I don't-we go home and usually watch a movie.

Good-bye 2011

For New Year's Eve we probably would have preferred to stay home and fall asleep on the couch, but we had to keep up with the newlyweds (2 years is still new). So we climbed a roof that shall remain nameless, and got a great view of the Vegas Strip Fireworks. I'll admit that it was better than sitting on the couch. 

Did I mention that we brought chairs, blankets and hot chocolate up with us? Over the chain link fence, up the dumpster and pipe, and one more ladder? Yeah--I'm still wondering if it was worth it!

Oh wait, look at that view. Yes, it was

Like I said, we had to keep up with the young ones

Happy 2012!

Christmas Break

Jeff and Jill were in town for a couple of weeks. It is awesome to see them and we tried to spend time with them everyday they were here.
The favorite activity: golf!

I think the spectators had more fun than the golfers

These guys went to a midnight hockey game. You will notice who was smart enough to stay home!